this is so kawaii i sharted and flew to mexico using my sharts and then i ate 3 homeless people and ascended to the heavens to start a quest to find the golden toilet and when i found it i fell in and become a skibidi toilet 🥰

this is so kawaii i choked on my drink and it cried so i threw it in the adoption center and ran away and went to the store to find some zaza and consume it and after that i ran from the cops bc i comited arson and i fell into a river and the cops fell in their too and drowened and it was boring so i fell asleep and dreamt about air and then i woke up and stroke and fell asleep again and woke up in a white padded room 🥰

this is so kawaii i played thick of it on the piano and one of the keys broke and i had to pay to fix it but i was broke so i comitted tax evasion and got put under house arrest so i ate my ankle monitor and broke the wall and ran away and bought oil at the store and covered myself in it so i could walk on water and i ran across the ocean and the police nuked me for leaving my house while under house arrest and i died but im a cat therian so i have 9 lives and i kept walking until i got to greenland and i stole its green so its just land now and teleported back to my house again 🥰

Hey there! We couldn’t reach your DMs, but we would like to thank you for supporting our toenail clipping business. Your order of our XXL jar of toenail clippings is estimated to arrive next week. Your additional order of our XL armpit shavings jar will arrive tomorrow on Wednesday, December 23. We have included a freebie of our body pillow - “Gacha Life Femboy” edition in your order as a gift for your support over the past six years. Thank you so much for supporting us! ❤️

⚠️ATTENTION⚠️ DONT DRINK WATER AFTER EATING FISH!!! b'cos the water may causr the fish to swim and then u will feel gluglgulguglu in your stomach !!!!!!!!!REMEMBER!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've started growing genuine feelings for Mickey Mouse. My infatuation with him began jokingly, but now I find myself with butterflies at the sight of his smile. I imagine us happy together, devoted and without doubt. But inevitably, self awareness breaks through the fantasy and I'm left to spend the rest of the day questioning what went wrong with me. Agonizing over a dream that could never be. Wondering how I got to this point; in love with a corporate mascot.

Oh I’m sorry snowflake, did I OFFEND you? Do you want a hug? Do you want a kiss? I will kiss you. I will do it. That’s it.. mmh.. your lips are so soft, snowflake… mnnnhmmnn…..ahh…S-Snowflake…

Hi! I saw there was an E in your message, and i wanted to ask if you could censor this next time because three Egyptian men broke into my house and took my son Emanuel.

So basically what happened was when the dinosaur started breakdancing on the ceiling, the tap dancing frog told him to get off the air while he was ironing the grass then he won the apple while the blueberry was actually the Jiggy ant in disguise...then the Jiggy ant in disguise started folding water into origami swans while reciting Shakespearean sonnets. Meanwhile, the tap dancing frog's cousin, a disco-dancing rhino named Ziggy, was drinking air from a straw and burping out bubbles that turned into tiny, floating pianos. Suddenly, a giant, talking piece of toast named Crumbly appeared, wearing a top hat and monocle, and began to conduct a symphony of squeaky toys and kazoos. Just as the music reached its crescendo, a team of ninja chickens, led by their fearless leader, Cluck Norris, swooped in and started juggling chainsaws while riding unicycles on a tightrope suspended over a pool of chocolate pudding. And that's when things really got weird......And that's when things really got weird. Suddenly, a giant, talking eggplant named Bob appeared, playing a trombone solo while balancing on a skateboard. Meanwhile, the ninja chickens were joined by a team of disco-dancing pandas, led by their fearless leader, Panda-monium, who were riding giant, inflatable unicorns while reciting the entire script of "Hamlet" backwards. Just as the pandas finished their recitation, a group of time-traveling, tutu-wearing dinosaurs, led by the infamous T-Rex ballerina, Rexy, burst onto the scene, performing a choreographed ballet routine while juggling flaming torches and eating spaghetti with meatballs. As the dinosaurs took their final bow, a massive, talking piece of lasagna named Larry descended from the sky, playing a grand piano concerto while being carried by a swarm of robotic, harmonica-playing bees. And just when you thought it was all over, a giant, inflatable, accordion-playing squid named Squiggles emerged from the depths of the ocean, playing a polka party anthem while being accompanied by a chorus line of tap-dancing top-hat-wearing lobsters...

thats great heres how to make lemon loaf Ingredients For the loaf: ½ cup softened butter 1 cup granulated sugar 2 large eggs, at room temperature 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 1½ cups all-purpose flour 1 teaspoon baking powder ¼ teaspoon salt ½ cup Greek yogurt or sour cream Juice of 1 lemon (about 3 tablespoons) Zest of 1 lemon (optional) For the glaze: 1 cup powdered sugar 3 tablespoons fresh lemon juice Instructions Preheat the oven. Preheat your oven to 350°F (175°C) and grease and line a 9x5-inch loaf pan. Whisk dry ingredients. In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, and salt. Whisk wet ingredients. In a large bowl, whisk the softened butter, granulated sugar, eggs, and vanilla until creamy. Add yogurt and lemon. Add the Greek yogurt, lemon juice, and lemon zest (if using) and whisk until just combined. Combine wet and dry. Fold the dry ingredients into the wet mixture until just combined. Do not overmix. Bake the loaf. Pour the batter into the prepared pan and bake for 45 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Make the glaze. While the loaf cools, whisk together the powdered sugar and lemon juice until smooth. Glaze and serve. Drizzle the glaze liberally over the cooled loaf before slicing.