See both the person and the disability. On one hand, not seeing the person may lead you to introduce them as "my autistic friend," stereotype them, or treat them like a child. On the other, refusing to acknowledge the disability and not accommodating their needs is also unhelpful. Strike a balance by treating their differences as natural, and overall unremarkable. Be clear about how you feel and what you want. Autistic people may not pick up hints or cues, so it's best to directly state your feelings. This helps eliminate confusion on both ends, and that way if the autistic person has upset you, they have the opportunity to make amends and learn from it. Warning: In most cases, people with autism are unable to cope when under pressure, so don't pressure them. Ask questions about how you can be accommodating and helpful. Get insight on how to relate to this person by talking with them about what it is like for them in particular to live as an autistic person. You may find that they want to share and can tell you lots of useful information that will help you to relate to them better. When applying this information, be sure to consider your autistic loved one as an individual, and remember that each step won't always apply to each person.

There is no one-size-fits-all approach for autism Understand that every autistic person is different. Tailor treatment to the individual's needs. For example, one autistic person may have excellent self-care skills and above-average school performance, but need sensory integration therapy and social skills training. Another might be highly social but unable to care for herself and in need of counseling for depression.

Expect different bødy language. Autistic people don't always make eye contact, sit still, or look at the person they are listening to. However, that doesn't mean they aren't paying attention. It's helpful to be direct, so they don't get confused about your intentions. Here are some examples of things you could say: "Do you want to hold hands?" "How about a kíss?" "Hey, I'm behind you. Want a hug?" (Some autistic people startle easily when touched from behind.) Autistic people might be uncomfortable with certain types of to͠uch and ıntımate, because of sensory issues. To find out what works for them, just ask. Having a clear conversation is easy for many autistic people, and you'll get a clear sense of what they like. Be clear about your own thoughts and feelings. Picking up on body language can be difficult work for an autistic person, and they might not realize what's going on, or guess completely wrong. If you want them to know your feelings, the easiest way is to express them out loud. "I'm sorry I snapped at you. I'm a little on edge today because of my dad coming. You did nothing wrong." "I wish you would have told me earlier about Amy's math meet. I would like to have rearranged my schedule so that I could be there for her." "It hur͘t my feelings when you said that my beard looked like a hipster beard." Be prepared for them to show and experience emotions differently. They may not understand their own feelings (alexithymia), and thus act less emotional than others (e.g. not appearing to grieve when family members dıe, even though they're very upset). This does not mean that they aren't experiencing emotions. Autistic people may react with a problem-solving approach: they see that you are upset, and they are determined to fix it so you can be happy. They may not realize that you don't want advice, just a listening ear. Autistic people may appear emotionless, even when they are experiencing deep emotions.